Mom Priorities: How to Line Up Your To Do List with Your Purpose | Ashley Varner
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Mom Priorities: How to Line Up Your To Do List with Your Purpose

Today I want to talk to you about mom priorities.

As a mom, how can you line up your to do list with your purpose?

It’s a fine line to walk, and in order to have that balance, it’s time to reevaluate your own priorities. I could give you a worksheet or a list, but sometimes that method can backfire.

Listen to the podcast here!

 

Why can worksheets and list backfire? Because the word “priorities” actually is a contradiction in itself.

By definition, you can only have one priority. Only one thing can be your priority.

Advice for Christian moms: Aligning your priority with your purpose | AshleyVarner.com

It’s when we begin to have more than one priority that our lives end up getting out of balance.

Think of it’s like this: Is it easier to carry one plate with six types of food on it or is it easier trying to handle six plates in the air, each with one type of food on it?

That’s how I want you to start thinking about your priorities, because right now if you have six priorities, you’re trying to juggle carrying six plates of food at one time, and what I want to teach you to do is to have one plate with six types of food on it. Trust me, it’s way easier to carry.

For the Christian Mom: How to Determine Your Priority and Align it with Your Purpose | AshleyVarner.com

What is your ONE Priority?

It’s way easier to have balance in your life when you have a one priority.

You can have several areas that stem from that one priority, but you can’t have more than one priority.

So what should that one priority be?

You might be thinking, this is crazy, Ashley. I’m a mom. I work full time and I volunteer. All these things are priorities in my life.

But I want to explain how a simple mindset change can really bring you back into balance into your life and how that change is going to help you align your to do list with your purpose.

It boils down to this truth: we’re here for a purpose that’s bigger than us. Whenever we cry out, “Lord, Lord,” when we invite Him to be our Savior and our King, we’re choosing Him over us.

That’s our number one priority. There can be no other.

When we choose God as our priority, what we’re choosing is:

His desires over our desires,

His plans over our plans,

His will over our will,

His perspective over our perspective,

and His priorities over ours.

 

What happens when you choose God’s priority…

See God isn’t human and limited like we are.

He can have more than one priority, so when He’s our only priority, then we can start to value all that He values.

When you discover what God values, you can begin to determine your to do list is based off of Him.

It all comes back to him.

Advice for Christian moms: Aligning your priority with your purpose | AshleyVarner.com

It’s like a target where the center is The Lord and then as we expand out, all those things still can be connected to Him.

What does that mean for us as moms? If something doesn’t line up with Him being your number one priority, then you know it can’t fit into your life.

So let’s find out what God values…

 

God Values You

The first thing that God wants you to value is you. And that seems crazy, I know.

Maybe you think that other things should be before that, but God wants you to value you.

He values you, He valued a relationship with you so much, that He came to Earth.

And the truth is: You can only truly give from the overflow. That’s a quote from Melissa Ambrosina, and I love it.

Advice for Christian moms: Aligning your priority with your purpose | AshleyVarner.com

You can only truly give from the overflow.

So as you’re filling your cup with Him, as you’re constantly being filled with Him and you’re valuing yourself because God values you, that becomes the fuel you use to truly give to other people.

Your relationship with the Lord is what God wants you to value. He wants you to value the time that you spend with Him.

He wants you to value your health because ultimately there’s only so much we can do in this life before we go to heaven.

If we want to be really purposeful and intentional, then our bodies have to be in a state that can handle that.

I never want my physical body to be a reason that I say no to something that God wants me to do, and so because of those things, I have to value myself, and my physical body, just like God values me.

 

God Values Your Marriage

Secondly, God wants you to value your marriage, and I want you to notice that marriage came before kids.

God wants you to value your marriage above your children because when you have a marriage that you value and a relationship with your spouse that is intentional and that you value, it will trickle down to your children. Period

Advice for Christian moms: Aligning your priority with your purpose | AshleyVarner.com

It doesn’t matter how much you value your children, if you’re not valuing your marriage, they are going to be negatively impacted by that.

God cares about marriage. He designed it, and when we value what He values, He’s going to bless us for that.

How do you value your marriage? Spend quality time with your husband. Make time for regular date nights. Don’t speak condescendingly to him. Those are all a great start. If you haven’t read The Five Love Languages, I highly recommend it!

 

God Values Your Children

Next, God wants you to value your children. Now this is something that I talk about a lot. I wholeheartedly believe that God cares about the way that we parent the children that He’s entrusted to us.

When we see God is our only priority, we can see how that trickles down to each area of our lives. Each type of food on the plate, so to speak.

Because I’ve touched on this truth so much already, so I’ll link to a few posts that dive deeper into it:

Related: Teaching Your Kids God’s Word

Related: How to Raise Confident Kids: Advice for Christian Moms

Related: Limiting Technology for Healthier and Happier Kids

 

And just as marriage came before children, I want you to notice that kids come before work and ministry.

 

God Values Your Home, Work, and Ministry

God wants us to value our home.

As women were responsible for taking care of our home and in Proverbs 31, we sometimes see this Proverbs 31 Woman as the perfect woman.

Sometimes we strive for that, but what that poem in proverbs is really trying to teach us is that wisdom is personified by the Proverbs 31 Woman.

A wise woman takes care of the home and a wise woman wakes up early to make sure that her home is taken care of.

Advice for Christian moms: Aligning your priority with your purpose | AshleyVarner.com

She’s not idle, but she can delegate. God wants you to value the time that you spend at home, not resent it.

God also values hard work and service to others.

Our lives get out of balance, when we don’t value hard work.

There’s nothing wrong with working smart or hiring help, but if doing those things means that you’re being idle, then it’s time to rethink what we’re delegating.

Lastly, God values your ministry.

Maybe ministry and work are the same for you. Maybe you’re a pastor or pastor’s wife. Maybe the secretary at a churhc.

Maybe where you’re working is part of your ministry and that’s amazing. That’s how my husband and I view our business. It’s a ministry.

Or maybe you work and your ministry is all volunteer. If so, I know the sacrifice that takes, and I promise you that God values your work.

 

Get Personal: Aligning your to do list with your purpose

When you align your values with your ONE Priority here’s what it looks like:

  1. Your relationship with the Lord
  2. Your marriage
  3. Your children
  4. Your home, work and ministry.

That’s how you line up your to do list with your purpose, you make sure it fits in one of those categories, in that order.

There is a daily time that I spend with the Lord. There’s times that I spend maybe going for a walk or exercising. And there are times I spend with my husband that have to be higher up on my to do list because that’s where my value is.

My priority is my Heavenly Father and so, as a act of obedience to Him, I choose to value what He values.

Look at your to-do list. Whether it’s in the reminders of your phone or written out somewhere in your calendar.

Look at your to do list and tell me: does each item on that list line up with God as your priority?

Sometimes we think of “mom-priorities” as a huge list of a thousand different things. But begin to see it as though you’re holding one plate and that plate is the Lord. Then all those different foods that are on it are all the different things that He values.

Does your to do list line up with one of those values?

If it’s filing paperwork, well that’s part of work so do that with the best of your ability as doing it for the Lord and not for men.

If it is doing laundry, well you know that God values the home, so you need to also.

That’s something on your to do list that lines up with your purpose.

If it’s tucking your kids into bed at night, if it’s having a date night with your husband, if it’s going out for a jog, all those things line up to your One Priority, your one purpose.

As you start to see your priorities in that way, you start to have more joy and more hope in the tasks that you have to do. Things become more joyful for you because you know the reason that you’re doing these tasks.

You know the ultimate priority that’s been met based on all these tasks that you have.

Advice for Christian moms: Aligning your priority with your purpose | AshleyVarner.com

 

Take the Next Step

It’s easy to feel overwhelmed by the many priorities we have as moms.

We have a to do list that’s longer than our arm and the big picture seems very bleak.

But God changes everything.

When God becomes your ONLY Priority, your tasks and your to do list and purpose begin to line up underneath the umbrella of Who your One Priority is.

Then you begin to live with joy because you know when to say yes and when to say no.

I talk all about this in my newest program: The Super Mom Roadmap. Check out all the details HERE. But I’ll give you a teeny, tiny hit: the S stands for Surrender.

Because trust me, mama, motherhood is so much sweeter when we surrender it to Him.

I hope that this was motivation for you to move forward in your role of being a purposeful mom, about really seeing how our priorities really should be blanketed under one priority.

Whenever we do that, we know that the Lord is going to bless us for that. And He’s going to bless our family.

And if we gain nothing else, we can be joyful knowing that we’re doing what He wants us to do and we’re putting Him before everything else in our lives.

 

For the Christian Mom: How to Determine Your Priority and Align it with Your Purpose | AshleyVarner.com
For the Christian Mom: How to Determine Your Priority and Align it with Your Purpose | AshleyVarner.com
For the Christian Mom: How to Determine Your Priority and Align it with Your Purpose | AshleyVarner.com

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