6 Mindsets of Women Who Are Living Their Dreams

How do the mindsets of successful women differ from those who aren’t as successful? Today we’re answering that question and discovering the 6 mindsets of women who live out the dreams that God has placed in their hearts.

Resources Mentioned:

The Mindset Reset
Renew180 (formerly 180Confidence)

Video: How to Take Your Thoughts Captive

Failure is Good

We usually see failure as an absolute negative in our lives, but anyone who is striving to reach their dreams will hit roadblocks of failure. The difference between women who are living their dreams and women who aren’t is that successful women know that failure is a good thing.

My family watches a lot of documentaries about entrepreneurs and the failures that they had to overcome to reach their goals. I want my kids to see these documentaries because I want them to know that it is okay to fail.

If you’re not failing, you’re not striving for more.

We don’t want to live comfortable lives. We want to strive for more, and that will always mean that we will experience failure. To reach a new height, you have to do things that you have never done before, and failures are inevitable in uncharted territory.

The way that you handle failure means everything. Successful women know that failure is a stepping stone for success. They know that anytime they are experiencing failure they are actually learning the lessons they need to know to get where they want to be.

There is a gap between where you are and where you want to be. We might be tempted to ignore that gap, but we should actually appreciate it. We have to fill the gap with everything we learn from our failures.

Learn From Successful People

Successful women learn from successful people. They are intentional about seeking out and learning from successful people, and they ignore advice from people who don’t have the results they want.

Determining who you take advice from is crucial. Women who are going after their God-given purpose know that they need mentors in their lives.

I’ve heard it said that we need women ahead of us to learn from, beside us to learn with, and behind us to teach. If you don’t have a good Christian mentor who is speaking God’s truth into your life, I want you to be intentional about finding that person.

It doesn’t even have to be an in-person mentorship. In December, I am opening Renew180 (formerly 180Confidence), a mastermind for Christian women who have seen some success but are still missing one piece: confidence. It’s a six-month program with live calls from me, Bible-based instruction, and an app that you can download right to your phone. Join today!

Deal With Your Thoughts and Emotions

Before you can deal with your thoughts and emotions, you have to be aware of them. We have to learn to examine the thoughts that come into our minds and make them obedient to Christ.

Once you change your thinking, your emotions will follow. When you have an emotion, look for the thought that is inspiring it, then see if that thought lines up with God’s Word. Get your thoughts lined up with God’s Word, and then let your emotions come from those thoughts.

Spend Time with Like-Minded People

Have you ever heard the saying that you are the average of the five people that you spend the most time with? Women can get so focused on building a community that they fail to evaluate if it’s the right kind of community.

That might mean reading books by authors who don’t have the same morals and Biblical foundation or listening to podcasts from successful people who have beliefs that we as Christians cannot agree with. I encourage the women that I coach to find a community that is Biblical and that will encourage their spiritual growth.

Not only should your community be Biblical, but it should also be willing to grow with you. I have seen many women lose people in their community as they grow. Most of the time, that is because the people in their community weren’t ready to grow or weren’t able to celebrate their growth because of jealousy or comparison.

I’m not just talking about financial or business success. Sometimes it’s one friend getting married before another or having a baby first. Success can be in any area of life where someone has reached their desired status. That’s why women can have success in many areas of life but feel unsatisfied with one area.

That’s also why Renew180 (formerly 180Confidence) is for successful women, too. Being successful in other areas of your life does not guarantee that you have confidence.

Focus on the Journey

I’m going to let you in on a little secret: whenever you set a goal, the goal isn’t really what you want to achieve. It’s not just about checking off a list of things to do. It’s about becoming the person who does those things.

If you want to make a certain dollar amount, your goal isn’t really about hitting a number in your bank account. It’s about the skills you acquire to get there. It’s all about the journey.

Since the goal is all about the journey, you really haven’t failed if you don’t hit your goal by the certain time that you planned. You’ve still taken the steps toward that goal, and each step has helped you get closer to becoming the person that you want to be.

The Value of Being Uncomfortable

Society tells us to work towards an easier life that is filled with all the comforts that we want. However, I have discovered that being uncomfortable produces so much more value.

If something feels uncomfortable, you probably aren’t doing it enough. You need more practice with it. This can apply to anything: praying, filming, teaching, etc.

Start thinking about the difficulty in a different way.

Example: When you first start working out, lifting weights is uncomfortable. The difficulty is what you want, though. If you are lifting a weight that is comfortable, you’re not building any muscle.

Change happens when we are uncomfortable. God works in our uncomfortable state.

I like to choose a word for each year to go along with my New Year’s resolutions. My word a couple of years ago was “uncomfortable.” That year, I started forcing myself to do uncomfortable things, and that was the year that we started fostering.

I changed a lot of things in my life, and that changed me.

As you are doing the uncomfortable, your confidence will grow. Confidence will help you step out and do what God wants you to do.

This might be the most important of the mindsets. Having this mindset will help you know that it is okay to be uncomfortable. It’s okay to grow and change. And that’s what this is all about, friends.

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- Ashley Varner

it’s my goal to reach every Christian mom with the truth that God wants to transform their life by renewing their mind.

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